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Writer's pictureAshley Weiss

Who Lights Your Fire? Part 1

Updated: Jun 30, 2018

At the time of writing this the husband and I sat down to watch Baywatch with Dwayne ‘The Rock’s Johnson and he remarked.


“oh I see why you wanted to watch this. The rock is in it, trying to get you motor running.”


He was joking if course but I got me to thinking. Why don't I use This big burly man to get me going?

Light my fire ROCK! *not*




It took me a long time to teach myself to keep my desires in check. I have learned to keep my focus on my wonderful and super sexy husband. It took me having to constantly reminding myself that I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine. So I should only long after him, right? Just like he should only long after me.


We as humans are constantly fighting this battle of the flesh and are bombarded by half naked men and women. I have someone who brings me men's magazine once she is done with them. Her favorite thing to do is to lust after the men then pass this onto me so I too may enjoy their beauty. Of course I don't, that would be disrespectful to my husband not to mention lustful and I refuse to participate. I smile at her kindly and then I toss them as soon as she is out of sight. My husband knows she brings these magazines to me and says he doesn't mind, but I know better.

Imagine how you would feel if you found magazines of half naked women around the house and your husband just calmly flipping through it.


I feel it is wrong to get turned on by another male as I feel it is wrong for him to get turned on by another female. We should be enough for one another. I should light his fire and he should light mine.


Now, it takes someone who is mature enough spiritually to say, “whoa, I've crossed a line and I need to stop.” and to take certain steps to avoid the lust trap.

  1. Pray! Continually pray. There is a way of escape, just pray.

  2. If you are feeling drawn to someone you know personally avoid contact with that person, or limit contact.

  3. Never be alone with someone you feel attracted to.

  4. If you find yourself lusting after a fictional character then switch the channel or fast forward through the scene that is causing the issue.

  5. Talk it out with someone who can help you stay strong.


I do believe it is alright to notice someone who is attractive. Whether that person is of the opposite sex or the same sex. We as a people are going to notice someone who is attractive. However, there is a moment we all need to be aware of. When the innocence of noticing someone attractive turns into the sinful nature of becoming aroused by that person's beauty. If you find yourself day dreaming of them in an intimate way or your heart quickens when you see them then DANGER WILL ROBINSON, DANGER! You are have crossed that line. The whole thing can be messy and confusing at first but have no mistake It is wrong.


Sex is to be about the ultimate connection between husband and wife, and if either of you are using outside influences to get you motor running then sex becomes just a way to satiate that hunger. WHAM, BAM, THANK YOU MA'AM so to speak. You are no longer connecting the way God intended.


When you are initiating in sex with your spouse you are fulfilling one of the promises to God, Loving your spouse. What better way to do that then to be completely naked, completely vulnerable, and completely open.



 Sex is to be about the ultimate connection between husband and wife

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